Healing and Changing Non-Stop

Sigh. Who are you really as a person? How far back in your life's history would you go in order to answer that? I remember around my sophomore year in high school trying to answer that question about myself. "Who am I?"

When you're just getting started in life, it's kind of like going fishing and hoping to see what answer comes out of the water. Where do I go for the answer? Maybe one reason it's hard to answer is because there are many places to go to receive feedback about who we are. How do my life choices define me so far? Who would I like to be perceived as? What do people say about me: friends, strangers, parents, teachers, social media, culture, the guy I want to like me, etc?

Notice something missing? Who does God say I am? The best place to go "fishing" is in the Bible. No version of ourselves we could create would ever be as good as the one God made for us from the beginning of time. When He wrote us into His Story, He gave us an incredible amount of value, simply for being His. I know I said the Bible is the best place, and I should add, the first place we go to learn about who we truly are (after all, our Creator would be the person to ask), but sometimes God can speak to us in seemingly little ways too.

I'll never forget one sad day, I was sitting on my bed with my toddler near me, I don't know what happened or how it happened that all of a sudden my i-phone's speaking feature somehow replied as a message on my screen saying, "I value you girl". It was so random, but just what I needed to hear. It wasn't something I was looking for to hear from God or my phone, but something I needed to be reminded of at that moment. My phone hasn't done something like that again, would be pretty cool if it did, but truly what God has in store for us, even in small ways, in this life is truly enough.

I've often shared on my YouTube videos my experiences feeling disappointed or coming to terms with the reality that sometimes God doesn't heal us when and how we want Him to. It can be super frustrating, but recently I've been learning that sometimes we are the ones who don't make ourselves available for God to change and heal us. This goes back to my first question: who are we really?

We are what God says we are, who He created us to be, but because of the sin that has messed things up on this earth, and our continual participation in it, the question becomes: Who does God want me to become?

My answer now, versus what my sophomore answer might have been is: I am constantly being changed into more of the likeness of Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit has a lot on His plate when it comes to me. He has to deal with my childhood issues, my teenager and young adult choices, and my recent decade of a mess that I have made trying to do things in my own strength. Thankfully, nothing is impossible for God.

I suppose we all have our own life situation the Holy Spirit needs to refine in us. I'm so thankful Jesus left us with the Holy Spirit, to be with us each day in such a close and personal way. One thing is for sure: He constantly wants to heal and change us for the better. Our part is to let Him. Let go, and trust Him.

He sees beyond what any counselor or confidant can see. He knows what happened, and what needs to happen in order to bring lasting restoration in us. And although He is more than enough, He will also use people in that process, but those people alone would not be enough without the Healer.

Personally speaking, I can feel Him bringing to my mind advice I have heard in counseling sessions, things I've read in books, positive things random people say about me, and more. It reminds me of the Genesis account, how God created something out of nothing. In the same way, when we stop messing with our own chaos and bring it to Him, that's when He brings order into our world.